Why Justin Timberlake Belongs to Us.

I first saw Justin Timberlake perform with *NSYNC in Memphis in 2000. Come to think of it, I guess that's the only time I've ever seen him perform. It was the No Strings Attached tour (at the Pyramid) and I was with my three of my closest high school friends.

The experience was amazing, but a big part of that probably had to do with the fact that I was in Memphis with no adult supervision. I was a fairly big NSYNC fan, and thought Justin was great.

However, my real main squeeze was Howie D. from the Backstreet Boys, so I didn't geek out or go all crazy fan girl like some other concert attendees. A girl sitting behind us kept screaming in a high pitch voice "I LOVE YOU JUSTIN TIMBERLAAAAAAKE" while she dabbed her perspiration with a washcloth.

If you had told me that fifteen years later I'd be crying over Justin Timberlake myself, I wouldn't have believed it. But it's true.

At the concert, there was one point where they brought up one of Justin's former teachers who presented him with an official high school diploma, seeing as how he was a Memphis native and had missed out on the traditional high school experience because of touring and just being so famous.

It was a particularly poignant moment for my best friend and me, since we were just a few weeks shy of our own high school graduation. We've talked about it over the years, how Justin Timberlake is such a huge part of the zeitgeist during our coming of age years. At one point, I remember saying that being there for his "graduation" meant so much to me because it felt like Justin belonged to us: people our age, but also me and my friend.

I think my friend probably said something like, "yes, but that's what stalkers say too."

Today I watched a video of Justin Timberlake's acceptance speech into the Memphis Music Hall of Fame. And cried like a baby. As a Tennessean and a southerner I can say that he truly does belong to us. And we should all be proud.

The video is nearly 40 minutes long (including Jimmy Fallon's hilarious introduction and general antics throughout). But I encourage you to watch it.

Here are the high points that left an impact on me.

1) Remember who you are and where you come from. My dad has been saying this to me all my life. Without a clear sense of your identity and the people who helped get you there, it's impossible to know where you're going.

2) And don't apologize for where you come from, either. You can't help it if you were born in a hospital or in a house out in the country. You didn't get to choose your neighborhood nor the people in your family. There's no sense being sorry about it because it helped shape who you are.

3) Don't be afraid to be vulnerable. Part of why I cried while watching the video is that Justin cried, too. To me, people who aren't afraid to show emotions are the ones with the real strength. And being a stoic just isn't any fun.

4) Pick the right friends and keep 'em. Justin thanked his longtime best friend in his speech and it was such a touching moment. No matter where life takes you, it's so nice to have people who can say they knew you when.

5) Choose a spouse or partner who will support your dreams. Justin's sentiments for wife Jessica Biel were short and sweet, but also heartfelt. He called her his rock and noted that while not a native, she had earned her status as an honorary Memphian by being such a strong person.

6) Know how to laugh at yourself and roll with the punches. Even though Justin's speech was supposedly playing out on a teleprompter, there were many great impromptu moments. And instead of freaking out or acting miffed, he rolled with it. This can be challenging for those of us who are inclined to embrace control (do you like how I said control freaks in a nicer way?). But I think you miss out on a lot of things you couldn't have imagined if you just let go and see what happens.

7) Believe anything is possible. How does a kid from a Memphis suburb end up as one of the biggest stars in the world? By believing it can be done. Justin told a story about how when he was ten, he figured out that Al Green was also living in Memphis, not too far away from his family. He decided that if someone else in Memphis could make an incredible career out of music, he could do it too.

8) Work hard. In his introduction, Jimm Fallon mentioned Justin Timberlake's extremely dedicated work ethic. I find it interesting that most of the people who equate their success to good luck were actually just really hard workers who looked for opportunities and weren't afraid to go for it.

9) Recognize your community. Nobody ever get anywhere alone. No matter how much hard work you put in, there are always people who helped you get there. I love how Justin thanks his grandparents, calling them his "original entourage." Then of course he also recognized many of the other artists whose work paved the way and inspired him through the years.

10) Be yourself. I've never met Justin Timberlake. I don't know what he's 'really like' any more than you do. But he just seems so genuine and real. That's hard to fake. Have you ever found yourself acting like something you're not? Being someone you're not? It takes way too much energy to keep this up. You are you for a reason. Just be you.

I was really inspired today by Justin Timberlake. It's not that I want to be a pop star or a music mogul. But I have a dream that I'd like to see become a reality. I bet you do too. Justin Timberlake reminded me that anything is possible. He reminded me that you don't have to sell-out or change who you are or conform to who you think the world wants you to be. He reminded me to keep chasing my dream and never give up. I hope you do the same.

Classic Holiday Fashions for the Southern Gentleman from Onward Reserve

The holiday season is such a festive time, but it can be stressful too. Socializing with co-workers is one thing that tops many peoples' worry lists. This year, I've been invited to a couple different work-related soirees, but instead of going solo as I might have done in the past, I get to bring my southern beau. 

He's definitely a jeans & t-shirt kind of guy, so the thought of dressing up for a bunch of different parties isn't his cup of tea. Maybe you have a spouse or partner who falls into this category. I decided to enlist the help of an expert, in this case the fine folks at ONWARD RESERVE. 

A luxury and specialty retailer, ONWARD RESERVE was founded by T.J. Callaway and has three locations in Georgia (Athens, Buckhead, and Thomasville) as well as Charlotte, North Carolina and a Chattanooga, Tennessee pop-up shop.  

In an effort to provide consumers with the very best in lifestyle brands as well as up and coming collections, T.J. Callaway established ONWARD RESERVE in 2012, after leaving a successful career in investment banking. Some of the designers and international brands carried by the shop include: Barbour, Peter Millar, Dubarry, Vilebrequin and others. However, the stores also pride themselves in offering unique finds from brands like Smathers & Branson, Fulton & Roark, Martin Dingman and Token & Icon.

I sat down with Virginia Johnson, the creative director of ONWARD RESERVE to talk about some style options for a dapper gent this holiday season and beyond. 

SBS: The holidays are here and that means parties. Are you getting excited? 

OR: Who doesn’t love holiday parties? I especially love another excuse to get dressed up! 

SBS: I love getting dressed up too, but my beau isn't quite a fan. Can you help me guide him toward some fail-safe options for our holiday social calendar? 

OR: Guys may not have the same love for getting dressed up as girls do, but at Onward Reserve we make it easy to shop for things that he’ll want to wear. 

For a fun festive look these “Party Pants” are sure to be a hit:

Pair the party pants with this quarter zip sweater:  

SBS: I'm loving those pants up there, but they might be out of my beau's comfort zone.

OR: If he’s a little more conservative try these cords

with a classic button down, like this  

and a cashmere sweater for warmth. 

SBS: What if the holiday party is a bit more dressy? Not black tie, but not super casual either.

OR: The occasion may call for a blazer, in which case I prefer to ditch boring navy and go for a cool tweed like one of these beautiful Martin Dingman jackets.

SBS: That's gorgeous! Okay, one last question. What about footwear? My guy lives in Chaco sandals most of the year, but they aren't really holiday gathering appropriate...if you know what I mean.

OR: If you’re going to be partying all night-he’s going to need great looking, comfortable shoes.

These are perfect: 

SBS: What great options! Thanks so much Virginia for sharing your ideas about holiday fashion for the guy who wants to look great and feel confident (and comfortable) at the same time. Is there anything else you'd like to share with Southern Belle Simple readers? 

OR: Onward Reserve currently has 5 retail locations. Our stores are a fun, comfortable place for guys and their better halves to shop. Grab a beer, watch the game and get some holiday shopping done!

Happy Holidays y'all! 

** I was not compensated in any way for this post, nor are these affiliate links. Just wanted to share some cool stuff with you.** 

Glory Day: Memories of Football and Family

Growing up in the south, especially in Tennessee, it's sacrilege if you don't like football. I'm just not much for sports of any kind...even though I've always sort of tried to be excited. Tailgating I like...the eating and socializing part. It's just the game watching I don't feel as strongly about.

If this means we can't be friends anymore, I understand.

But what small connection I do have to football has less to do with any particular team and more to do with my grandpa. That's him up there in the photo, second row from the bottom, fourth from the right. This was his high school team in Oak Ridge, Tennessee.

I'm sure my grandpa always wanted a grandson he could play football with and teach the rules of the game. Since I came along instead, we made do. I'd humor him by listening to stories of his glory days and help him cheer on his favorite teams (University of Tennessee, Auburn, and whoever happened to be playing Georgia). Then he'd play Barbies with me (sometimes).

Football was a big part of my grandpa's identity. It shaped his youth and then his college experience. And while he went on to become a father and a grandfather and have a successful career, I believe it all goes back to football for him.

When he talks about those days, his eyes light up in a way that is hard to explain. He can still remember so many details about his experiences. I used to sit and listen to those stories as a child to humor him....now I ask him to tell me and I hang on every word.

Today, he turned 78. I count him as one of the biggest blessings of my life. All my grandparents have been. I know we shouldn't spend too much time looking back, but I really like to know about the people I come from...their stories, their hopes and dreams, their silly antics and their cherished memories. One day, when he is no longer around to tell me these things, I hope I've heard his stories enough times that they are always with me.

Slow, Quick, Quick, Slow (or Why Dancing with the Stars won't be calling anytime soon)

 by ADiamondFellFromTheSky (contact)

For the past couple days, I have found myself repeating this little phrase in my head: slow, quick, quick, slow, quick, quick, slow, quick, quick....You get the picture. 

I'm not going crazy, although I can see how it seems that way. 

The reason I've got the phrase in my head is because earlier this week my southern beau and I had a dancing lesson. It was all his doing as a surprise for me and we were actually supposed to have the lesson last week, but then life (in the form of a burst hot water heater) got in the way. 

There's a dance studio in my neighborhood, next to the fancy grocery store where we sometimes go for gourmet chocolate and free coffee samples. I had peered in the window at the elegant couples moving gracefully around the floor and remarked how we should go dancing sometime...although it was mainly just wishful thinking. 

Apparently my wishful thinking worked because this week, I found myself being trotted around the same dance floor by my beau. 

 by anyjazz65 (contact)

Before we actually got to the dancing, we had to fill out a form for the instructor. One of the questions on the form was "Why do you want to learn to dance?" and my beau wrote "I don't." And that pretty much sums up his excitement level prior to the lesson. 

But he knew it was special for me and once we got on the floor, he kind of got into it. 

We attempted to learn the rumba and some beginner swing dance steps. Since neither of us has much dancing experience, it was mostly basic things...I doubt we'll be joining a professional dance circuit anytime soon. 

Mainly we just had fun. I've always heard that how you dance can be representative of how you approach life. Here are a few of our dancing experiences that demonstrate this: 

• I kept trying to lead (what can I say, I like to be in charge)
• When I didn't do a turn quickly enough, my beau would give me a little push (alas, he also likes to be in charge) 
• He also got really frustrated when he couldn't get it perfect after one try. 

The best part was just doing something together where we could laugh at ourselves and feel a little bit silly. It was a nice way to spend an evening. I highly recommend a dancing lesson if you are looking for something fun to do with your sweetie, a good friend or even by yourself. 

Just remember this: a rumba is a dance, a Roomba is a vacuum cleaner and Zumba is some kind of exercise. We kept getting them confused! 

 by Pat McDonald (contact)

National Hammock Day, or Another Reason My Grandpa is Awesome

Today is National Hammock Day. Since I find myself lacking a hammock at present, I'm celebrating the day in the best way I know how...reminiscing about my best hammock memories. 

When I was about 6 years old, my grandpa bought a hammock. It wasn't just any hammock, mind you. It was an original Pawleys Island hand-crafted rope hammock. My grandpa appreciates quality and he's always been one to do his research. After much reading and investigating, he determined that a Pawleys Island hammock was the best. So that's what he got. 

In his backyard were two tall trees. As a child, I believed they were planted with the express purpose of supporting a hammock just for me. Maybe my grandpa even told me that. He has always had a way of making me feel like the world (or at least his world) revolved around me in some form or fashion. 

He usually did yard work or tinkered in his basement workshop on Saturday mornings. But Saturday afternoons were hammock time. He'd carry the hammock up the concrete steps that led to the backyard from where it was stored in the basement. He'd pretend to need my help hanging it up using the metal hooks. 

Then we'd plop in. Sometimes I'd perch up at the corner, pretending to be a spider and the hammock was my web. Sometimes we'd be astronauts flying through space or explorers rafting down a river. Mostly I was just an adoring granddaughter begging him to tell me story after story of his childhood adventures. 

My grandpa rigged up a rope that was tied to my swing set. This is how we made the hammock rock. Sometimes we'd doze. My grandma would bring us sweet tea but I remember she rarely got in the hammock. It was just his thing, thus it became my thing too. 

To me, the most magical thing about the hammock was that in it, time sort of stood still. My everyday life was fairly scheduled with extra-curricular activities. At my grandparents' house, everything just stopped. If we wanted to stay up all night and sleep all day, that was fine. And if we wanted to lay in a hammock for hours on a Saturday, that was fine too. 

I know it's impossible, but if I could go back and re-live a day in my life, I'm pretty sure it would be a hammock day. I'd love to have a yard with two trees perfect for supporting an original Pawleys Island hammock someday. But until then, I've got enough hammock memories to do me just fine. 

Happy Hammock Day! 

[photo used via  by return the sun (contact)]

What is the Most Important Thing in Life?

While there are a few things that I do think top enthusiasm in life (love, family, faith), I have to agree with Tennessee Williams that enthusiasm is way up there. 

I used to hear that quote from Emerson that "nothing great was ever achieved without enthusiasm" and I'm only beginning to understand how true it is. 

Do you approach each day or each task with enthusiasm? For a long time, I certainly didn't...but now I'm so grateful to have a job I love and a daily routine I feel excited about. 

Who knows? Maybe injecting a little enthusiasm into your life will have a positive effect! 

Remembering Andy Griffith

There are so many things about our lives that never get settled or worked out in a way that we like. Many days end without resolution. I don't know about you, but I like knowing that I can visit a place where every problem, however minor, gets neatly solved (with a moral lesson to boot!) in twenty-one minutes. 

That is the Andy Griffith Show for me....a place from the past that gives me great comfort. 

Remembering Andy Griffith on what would have been his 87th birthday. We lost a true southern gentleman with his passing last year.